3-min read
2025-08-26
4-min read
Development isn’t a race. It’s a flow.
Every child—and parent—is figuring it out at their own pace.
Instead of milestones, we encourage you to focus on this amazing moment.
Your child’s brain makes more than one million neural connections per second in these first three years. Simple, consistent interactions with them today can have profound, lifelong benefits.
Here’s how little one’s brain is developing this month, and how you can support their progress.
Developmental Highlight
Little one’s “now” brain is slowly becoming a “now and then” brain. However, hearing “not now” can still be received as “no,” triggering frustration and tantrums—just as it did in month 27.
Soon, little one will start telling you “no” as a way of exercising their power. While this behavior can be stressful, inconvenient, and make you want to throw a tantrum of your own, it’s important to take a step back—and deep breath—to understand what’s happening developmentally. Little one is learning to express confidence and gain control by resisting demands placed on them.
To avoid a battle of the wills, offer little one two choices as often as you can. Instead of asking “Would you like to read a book?” try "Would you like to read a book or play with blocks?” This approach gives little one more power to make a choice.
Brain-Building Activity
“No” Your Limits
Routine: Anytime
Sometimes you have to put your foot down. Here’s what to know about “no” and how to handle the aftermath:
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“No” loses its power with repeated use, so reserve little one’s least favorite word for situations that pose a threat to their physical safety. Warnings like “be careful” caution little one and set limits without stifling their curiosity.
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When you do have to say “no,” help little one label the emotion they feel, being careful not to shame their reaction. For example, “You’re frustrated right now, aren’t you?” If they agree, then that may be enough to defuse the situation. But many little ones this age haven’t developed a strong sense of “yes” and may reply with their own “no.” Touché!
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Instead of trying to explain why you said “no,” offer little one a choice. For example, “You’re frustrated right now. Do you need a hug, or do you need to let it out?” Offering a hug is a way of physically maintaining connection. Don’t take it personally if little one declines the offer. Giving little one permission to let out their emotions can defuse the situation, since there’s no shaming involved.
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Let the storm of the tantrum pass and then celebrate little one’s ability to recover. That’s the big teachable moment here. You might say something like, “That was a big storm you got through. Let’s see if next time you can get through it faster, okay?”
You’ve Got This
“No” is a boundary, and setting boundaries is not a bad thing. In fact, finding some time and space for yourself is a way to recharge after trying parenting moments. If you find yourself mortified or frustrated by little one’s tantrums—especially when they happen in front of others—take a moment to recognize that your feelings are coming from a deep need to be a good parent. There’s no shame in that.
When you take time alone to cool down, you’re modeling the kind of self-regulation you’d like little one to practice. It might be hard to imagine, but they’ll get there eventually with your support, love, and patience.
